Things I have noticed with my weight loss pt. 2

1. You start to feel like a little kid when you feel your shoulders and your back and see your back in the mirror

2. Happiness, you notice you feel better inside about yourself

3. You start counting calories and wanting to know the servings size

4. You decide to eat less to save more so money becomes your excuse for self control

5. You start filling your breakfast bowl halfway with cereal and pouring milk only halfway in the cereal. No more to the top because what a waste of food and waste of milk

6. You can’t work out on your back anymore on hard floors,

you need to lay on something soft now

7. You learn about fatlogic and now you can’t stand to hear it

8. You get annoyed when people tell you how they wish they can look good as you but then they turn down your food advice and get annoyed with your food policing. Just shut up about my body then and your “envy” about my body if you have no intention of doing anything about yours.

9. You learn to eat half of the restaurant food on your plate and take the rest home

10. You start to practice intuitive eating

11. You realize you are not a real woman anymore because of all the “real women have curves” body shaming stuff you see online

12. You feel

whenever you see anyone accusing any athlete or fitness person or anyone showing some ribs or any skinny person of having an eating disorder or being underweight even though they don’t look like this:

13. “You have fast Metabolism.”

You feel every time you hear this and you want to scream

Things I have noticed with my weight loss

1. I get cold more often and 65 degrees AC is too cold for me.

2. I can’t fold my arms comfortable anymore. I can feel my rib cage and my hip bones.

3. I have to be careful when my knees touch or when I am in bed, I have to keep my legs spread and be careful with my arms so I am not hitting my rib cage or my hips.

4. I can feel the top of my butt bone now

5. I can feel my thigh bone now when I press on my thighs.

6. I can feel my butt bones now.

7. I can feel my tail bone pressing on my diaper when I work out and feel my hip bones press on the sides of my diaper when I lay down.

8. I have noticed gaps in my tummy and the skin looks pinched in

9. My tummy sink in when I lay down

10. I can see my top chest bones above my breasts

11. I can grab my skin on my tummy anymore and I can barely grab any and it hurts if anyone does it. I used to play with it and now I can’t anymore.

12. My tummy no longer hangs when on all fours

13. I can wear low rise jeans now without feeling fat and disgusted with my belly

14. Clothes feel different on me, I can feel them more

15. 90 degree heat feels weird on my body, it’s hot but yet I am not hot.

16. I can see my shoulder bones

17. I can see my back bones and my whole entire rib cage when I stretch my body

18. I can sometimes see my rib cage depending on how I stand or sit.

19. It’s uncomfortable to lean back in hard chairs. I can feel my back bones.

20. Diapers have gotten big on me, tabs too close together, the rise is too high, I undergrew out of the Bambinos because I no longer liked the fit and they don’t have a size small and they were leaking on me. But I hear the absorbency has decreased so maybe it’s not my weight then.

21. I can put my hands around my upper legs

22. I can feel my butt bone when I sit on hard surfaces depending on how I am sitting

23. There isn’t much of a belly roll when I sit or lean forward or bend down.

24. My son now loves to rub my back because he likes how my back feels because he likes feeling all my bones and he says it relaxes him.

25. I feel sick if I eat too much so I don’t eat much at all. Even a McDonalds hamburger will fill me up and then I will feel I ate too much because how my stomach feels. So I order small meals and I rather have my husband order large fries to split them with me. I order small in everything.

26. The skinny shaming comments; “Oh you look anorexic”-my dad. “you have an eating disorder”-my mother “you look unhealthy skinny”-my online friend so I didn’t speak to him for a few days.

27. Jeans feel real loose around my waist when I sit.

28. Some of my pants had started falling down and wouldn’t stay up.

29. Sometimes it’s uncomfortable when I am sitting and my rest my arms on my lap because of my hip bones my arms are resting on.

30. I have had to readjust my body positions when I lay down or sit because of my bones.

31. I have to eat junk food just to keep my weight on or else I am like that guy in Thinner where he can’t stop losing weight no matter how much he eats. I feel like him sometimes when I don’t have junk food. I will lose weight. I just love my sweets. Without them, I would lose weight because I prefer sweets than real food.

32. I have less body curves. Sometimes it looks like I have none.

33. I got a thigh gap now

34. My thighs don’t stick out as far.

35. My stretch marks are now in the middle of my upper leg where my thighs are because of weight loss. They used to be on the side.

36. I still look fat. I still look big in my photos, ugh the fat thighs and legs and my skin fold at the back of my rib cage so it looks like a body roll. My husband says it’s not and that is just skin. Then it’s gone depending on how I stand or sit and when I stretch.

Playing with my Loose skin

Residual of having kids. My belly looks perfect postpartum but when I pull on it, you realize how loose it actually is because of how far out I can pull it and how I can make it look like belly fat and have it hang out of the diaper and then it bounces back to normal. Then my daughter comes in the room so I had to stop the video and pull my shirt down. You can hear the door opening and that was her entering.


The video should start after clicking the link. I got this idea after seeing a couple youtube videos of former fat people pulling on their skin to show how far they can stretch it and theirs were a lot stretchier than mine. The most I have ever weighed my whole life was up to around 170 and that was in 7th grade. I was playing with my belly fat then too. So maybe some of my loose skin on my belly is from when I weighed more and then lost the weight because I didn’t like my body and how big I was so I stopped snacking for the taste of food and eating just to feel the texture and the taste and I stopped going for seconds during meals and walked more and dropped to 150 by 8th grade and stayed there until age 15. My weight had gone up and down since and I am hoping to keep it down this time.



I think I noticed another diaper on someone

Friday was my last day at the gym because I decided to cut bills so I cancelled it but they put my membership on hold instead for if I do decide to come back. The maximum is three months and this lady from ZUMBA class said to me, “You’re not going to do ZUMBA anymore?” and I said “I can do them at home, they have the videos on Youtube” and she said, “it’s no fun doing it all by yourself.” She has no idea. I have gotten myself dizzy there a few times where it feels like everything is gone in slow motion so I take a drink of water to see if it will go away and I keep at it ignoring the slow motion feeling like I am not there and my head feeling weird. It doesn’t happen every time.

But when I was in that class on Friday, I noticed an elder woman there who looked to be in her seventies or sixties and I could tell she was diapered because it was all puffy in her butt area. I wasn’t the only one wearing a diaper there. I wasn’t trying to find diapers on her, I just like looking at other people and seeing what they have on and how their bodies look and their hair and I noticed.

Being Tommy Pickles


I have been doing Hollywood Workouts for the past few days and the “game” requires you to put your Wii remote in your pocket during some workouts and I don’t have any pockets so I stick it in my diaper. Except it’s not a screw driver I am putting in there. That must hurt and be uncomfortable because of how pointy it is. I can feel the Wii remote and it pressing against my skin when I move and sometimes I just hold it in my hand so I wouldn’t have to feel it. The diaper is dry in that spot because I only pee in the middle.

Weight loss is a sensitive topic

I have seen threads about people being too small to fit into adult diapers because of how difficult it is to find mediums. Most people just tell them to put on weight or tell them about websites that sell adult size smalls. I have given that advice too.

But the opposite happened. someone wrote on a forum about being too big to fit into diapers and how most places won’t sell in his size with a 48 waist and how he requested to ABU to make a XL but they said no because of not enough demand. I gave him advice to lose the weight so he can fit into ABDL diapers. I told him to make his portions smaller, cut out calorie drinks and only drink water, cut back on sweets, work out for at least a half hour a day and he doesn’t need to join a gym for it, youtube has work out videos. Then I said I worked out three times a week and lost 14 lbs and I also cut back on sweets and did the gym.

Two hours later he deleted his OP saying he had been ridiculed and being told what a fat slob he is. I never said he was one and I never ridiculed him. But I have been seeing at r/fatlogic about fat people getting offended about someone losing weight or trying to change their life by deciding to change their diet to lose the weight or getting offended about how weight loss works and how they can lose it when they whine about how they can’t lose any and then someone telling them how it is possible and what they need to do. Lot of people are overweight because of how much  calories they consume and also because they give themselves the amount of calories their body uses so of course they’re not going to lose weight. Very few are overweight due to a medical issue. I also learned on r/fatlogic how high or low metabolism is a myth and it has to do with how much energy you use and how active you are and people tend to overestimate how much they eat or under estimate how much they eat. Sure I can have one day of over eating and then I drop the weight because I don’t eat like that everyday but that doesn’t mean I have high metabolism. I can eat one big meal and then not eat for the rest of the day and that is okay and skipping meals is not starving yourself nor is it an eating disorder and eating little isn’t one either, it’s actually normal and you’re not supposed to eat three big meals a day and having a sandwich for lunch and nothing else is fine. What I was doing is normal not an eating disorder I have been diagnosed as having. I think I recovered from it and just as long as I stay active and work out, I won’t have one.

I stood on the scale this morning and was up to 121 again, I have had too much to eat is why and now I am back to cutting back on sweets again and I had that one day where I consumed lot of calories because I ate at the IHOP which was 740 calories for the stack of pancakes and the glass of orange juice, then I had a cupcake and a can of mac and cheese which was two servings and it was 500 calories total. Then I had another cupcake. Then yesterday i had two cupcakes again and a banana and some other sweets I found at work and I had a peanut butter and jelly sandwich at home and for dinner I had some salad and chicken and it was a small plate but still too many calories that day I consumed because of sugar. Now I am going to cut back on calories again and that will keep my weight down. hat is why we have scales so we know our calorie intake and can watch our weight and know to cut back. I also forgot to mention I had diet pop yesterday but I didn’t have the whole can. But I finished it today and I had yogurt and one Reese’s candy. I love chocolate but I couldn’t have a bunch of it or have more than one and I will not eat again until noon.

Working out in poopy diapers

I sometimes work out in my poopy diaper. I have even gone running in it too outside. I do a two mile run when it’s nice out and not cloudy. I also work on my Wii Fit if I can’t go out and run and I have done it in a poopy diaper. I have never hit the gym in poopy diapers and have no desire too but I will go out and run in one because I am not going in any places and I am just outside and I run or walk past people. I did it this morning. I woke up in a poopy diaper I made last night while I was sitting on the couch watching TV and then I went to bed in it and woke up and watched more TV and had some breakfast and went out and ran.  I go about two miles and can do it in a half hour. I can probably go further now without getting tired but I would rather not spend hours working out and I already am trying to keep my weight at 120. I just keep dropping so I eat more food as a result of it by letting myself snack or having some sweets or have a calorie drink so my weight fluctuates between 117-121.


I am wearing a Tena Maxi Slip under my shorts and yes I am wearing a poopy one under them. Taken after my work out. Also those shorts look good on me and don’t make my hips or butt look big and I didn’t get cat called today. I just ignore it when it happens.

Undergrowing my diapers?

So I got up to 134 and I was going to be heading for another eating disorder which I don’t want so I decided to join a gym and start working out. I didn’t want to get fat and I worried my weight will keep going up and up and before I know it I would be back at my high school weight followed by my Junior high weight and I didn’t want that and then be obese because that is how people get fat in the first place or overweight. So I joined a gym and started to work out there three times a week and also doing some weight lifting and what do you know, my weight went back down again and I could finally eat again without any anxiety and I got down to 129 again and then I was at 127 at the 4th of July and gained a couple of pounds from food and then lost that couple of pounds again in a few days. I also started to run twice a day when I am not working and I run every morning and since it’s summer, I can go run outside but i still kept my gym membership because this weather won’t last long and soon it will be cold again and rainy. It rains here everyday in the fall and winter so don’t move here. Plus when it snows, it becomes a gridlock on the roads and your car becomes unsafe on the road and you are at a higher risk for a collision and this is over a couple inches of snow and it’s very difficult to drive in it here because they don’t sand them or even plow them because we have only a few of them. In Montana, no problem driving in the snow but only because they are equipped for it and my area is not.

But I also decided to start doing classes so I do ZUMBA every Wednesday and Friday and I tried Yoga and I didn’t like it so I only do workouts with weights and use the elliptical on Mondays. I got down to 123 last time I weighed myself and I don’t even starve myself, I still eat three times a day and snacks but I am still losing a pound. My parents decided to give me flack by telling me I am getting to skinny and I needed to eat more food and I am going to look anorexic and getting there. But my BMI is still in the normal range. So to satisfy them, I decided on some sweets for breakfast and told them how many pieces of pie I had and then I had a dairy Queen Blizzard that day but I had a size small.

I have been noticing the tabs on my Bambino diapers and they are closer together now and the top ones are close together and the bottom part of my diaper feels loose in the back and I think that is why I have been leaking lately because they are getting too big on me so I might be in between sizes now even though my hips are now measured 35 inches and I noticed my belly where my navel is shrunk an inch when I measured and my tummy is starting to look fit and I am noticed holes in them now meaning the skin is going in so there is a dip in my tummy on the side. For years I was never satisfied with my body and always felt fat and then accepted no matter how much weight I lose, I will never be happy with my body and it’s all in my head. I got down to 119 once after I had my son and I noticed I had more bones showing on my back and I got scared of being an anorexic I wouldn’t let myself go below 119 no matter how fat I looked and how big my thighs are and my hip size. But now they are shrinking and I am down to 123 as of last week when I last weighed myself. I just had to do different work outs and I think ZUMBA is helping. I did read it does help tone your belly and your body and I do lunges and I lay on the floor and hold my legs up in the air and down again. I read that also helps tone your belly too. Walking on the treadmill won’t help tone your body alone.

Now I might look into smaller sizes now and see if Bambino carries a size small and ABU and stuff and if not, I will still use mediums but try and make the bottom tighter. I have also noticed how far back the front of the diaper goes when I put one on and try and make it tight. The side of the front goes all the way to the back of my buttock.

I still see my big thighs and butt even though I have lost weight. But it’s in my head right?