Dry day

For some reason I didn’t have to pee all day. I ended up as an extra on the SpikeTV set for Ink Master: Angels and they paid us $70 bucks for being there all day until the end of the shooting. I had my parents give me a ride to the place and they dropped me off and I had to sign in and then wait around. They made us sign papers and more and more people got there and then we had to wait in line t get inside and then we went up the stairs to this huge room and it had a bar there too and they served beverages and drinks and water. The whole room could be used for parties and wedding receptions and it looked big enough to be used as a sound stage too. They had the set up and camera men and we all had to cover our logos and they put black tape over mine on my purse and I had to rip the label off my bottles water.

We had to show excitement and we had to do it twice because they were shooting it from different angles and then we watched the tattoo artists start putting on the tattoo on the person they were doing. I notice later I was starting to smell of urine so I went into the bathroom and changed and there were people in there so I threw the diaper in the tiny wastebasket and just pushed it down in there with my fist and washed my hands.

Despite having a whole bottle of water, I still never had to pee so I stayed dry and we were not allowed to sit or be on our phones or play video games or do anything but talk. If we had to sit, we had to go downstairs and sit in one of the folded chairs but only for five minutes and then we had to get back to the set.

Then at the end when I did go into the bathroom to call my father to come pick me up, I all of a sudden wet my diaper so it was as if I couldn’t do it out there on the set but could in the restroom? Our bodies do funny things. I didn’t feel the urge either until I was in the restroom.

I also got to take home some free snacks they had for us and I guess they wanted to get rid of them so they had them on the table for us to take when we signed out and they gave us an envelope with cash. That makes up for a day of work I had missed last week for play rehearsals. Then I got home and went straight to bed without even getting my pajamas on. I was tired and my legs were sore from standing. $70 is more than I make a day at my job.

So what I learned about reality TV, there is some acting in it but there is no script. They just tell us what to do and we do it rather it’s cheering or showing excitement and when they film scenes, there is no script, it’s just people talking to each other. They also had this lady who was dressed like Beetlejuice say the tattoo artists had three hours left and then after that she said two hours and one hour and thirty minutes and I knew they would be editing that into separate parts throughout the show and they actually pick people as extras by posting an ad about it and people sign up and they get back to you if they pick you and you have to confirm it. But I think all this was worth the 70 bucks despite depriving us from stimulation but it makes me wonder how did people handle waiting around with nothing to do before cell phones, oh that’s right, they talked so it was like the olden times again. But we were not allowed to do anything but read and people were allowed to leave the building and come back and walk around on the set. But we couldn’t all be gone at once because they didn’t want a large gap in the crowd and extras were allowed to invite friends and family to come and they all left and the paid ones stayed. I think that was their whole point of paying us, they don’t want us to leave so paying us makes us stay.

I came home and told my husband I made us 70 bucks and he said, “cool.”

Now I want to watch that TV show and keep an eye out for that episode and try and find myself in it.


Going to sell some things

I could use some extra money and I have a few things to get rid of I don’t want. We have a postal annex place near my house so I can just go there and all I have to do is tell them the zipcode and they will tell me the shipping cost and they package the item for me. I have gone there several times to mail stuff to my parents when they were gone for three months.

Hello Kitty outfit size XL:


Clown dress outfit, diaper cover and dress size XL:


Unopened baby formula:


I am not going to bother listing prices so I will do best offers. Give me your best price, my email is under Contact Me and just tell me your zipcode and I will head to the postal annex to get shipping estimate and that would include packaging too. If you live outside the US or live in Hawaii or Alaska, tell me the zipcode and your country and I will get back to you with the shipping price. I will also give you the tracking number too when the item is shipped.

These items will stay up until they are gone and I will check my email daily for seven days as of making this post. I will also be pinning this to my twitter page.

Help me pick out my next diaper brand

I am running a poll on my Twitter page for which brand I shall get next. There are 4 days and 3 hours left for voting. So far Crinklz is in the lead. I have that poll pinned so it’s at the top.

Another thing I learned about myself

You have probably heard of the Space Cadet by Tykables. Casey Strom sent them an email about his trademark in the word Space for his product. Tykables didn’t respond and kept the name. Casey went to an attorney and a letter was sent out to them about it. Basically he us sueing Tykables for the name. Casey’s concern is the name will cause confusion. People call his space diapers Space diaper than ABU Space and apparently it will be too inconvient now to specify what space diaper you want. He wrote about it here

Look, I have no problem being specific over brand names. I have to do it with towns, I say Vancouver, BC and Vancouver, Washington or Portland, Oregon or Portland, Maine, Washington state or Washington DC. And if you are not sure, just ask. We even say specific brand names for products if it matters what we want like Colgate Total or Herbal Essence or Jiff but we can’t do that over names of diapers? It’s going to be hard to say Tykables Space or ABU Space? Wow I must be that different then if this is what it’s all about. Casey has to protect his business from stupid people and lazy people for in case something goes wrong with the Space Cadet so they mistake it for ABU product and ABU ends up getting the blame for Tykables defect product or lets say someone failed to mention what specific diaper so they only wrote Space but failed to mention the company name too and everyone assumes they mean ABU Space because that is the first thing that comes to mind. When you hear the word London, I bet you think of the city that is in England, not Canada. But if we mean the one in Ontario, we say London, Ontario or are people too lazy for that too?

I have never confused My Diaper and Fabines when My Diaper did a rip off design of Fabine so they discontinued that print. Why did I never confused it? I looked at the name is why. Crinklz and Safari look very similar but I look at the brand name and it’s not confusing. I guess most people do not pay attention to this detail nor are they as pedantic as me. It bugs me to see binders being called notebooks and laptops being called notebooks but I am fine with netbook.

It even boggles my mind when people down the street from us get their own address wrong so we sometimes get their mail. Why? Because they have the same number as our house, same street name and same city but the only thing different is zipcode and SE and NE. But they still put in NE than SE and they use the wrong zipcode. How does this happen? Does their landlord have their address written down wrong? When we bought our house, we saw the address, it was on every estate website and it was on the bank too when we got the house and got the loan and put down a down payment and we used up all our savings for it and we nearly didn’t get the house but it was my money saving obsession that got us this house because of that money I saved. Lot of it was from my old work. So all these people living in their apartment have no excuse for this mistake because it’s written down when they sign their rental agreement and their address is listed on it. My mom told me people think SE and NE make no difference or they don’t pay attention to what their address says. Holy moly, people are this dense. I would be double checking my address and look at it written down to be sure it’s correct because I want to get my mail.

There is Milwaukee, Wisconsin and Milwaukie, Oregon. Why the different spelling? Postmen were getting confused. Didn’t they look at the state abbreviation? So they changed the spelling to stop this confusion. Wow. Maybe it’s time the city gives the apartments down the street a new number to stop the confusion.

I have no beef against Casey, it’s not his fault people are dense and too lazy to be specific about diaper brand and can’t be bothered to pay attention to the product name and company so he has to protect his business from that.

Reaching for my dream

Ever since 6th grade I decided I wanted to act. I am not sure why that came to me but I decided I wanted to be an actress. My parents didn’t want me to pursue it then, maybe they just wanted to be sure I was serious and it wasn’t a phase. They could have signed me up for acting classes but they didn’t. But the desire never went away and I thought it would be cool to be on film or be an extra in a movie. I even took drama in high school but only for one year because my school decided to drop that course for budget cuts and before then I was too busy working on life skills, I set that aside. Then I finished high school and where I lived we didn’t have that stuff like classes and all and I was never interested in stage acting. Now I am considering it. Some prefer stage acting and some prefer film, I mostly prefer film. I never liked plays or puppet shows, those were always boring. I have only gone to a very few plays my entire life and I mostly saw film.

But anyway I decided to try and pursue it so after my boss threatened to replace me, it gave me a push. I started going online and looking up how to start out as one with no experience and I decided to just take the classes so I looked them up online and found some in my area. I signed up for one of them and decided that can be a start and I created a acting resume and it has nothing on it but my name and email and body measurements and training now. I looked at other resumes online and saw some had theirs listed as school plays they were in, church plays so I put in my high school play. I did not put in any school plays from elementary school because I didn’t really do anything in them and it was not real acting and that one home movie we made with my baby sitter when I was nine, I didn’t put that down either.

But the teacher I have is really good and he is an actor himself and is a SAG member and is with the agency here in my town and he teaches his classes at their studio, he has also been on film and has a IMDB page and he still acts and still gets coached for his acting and still trains in it, you are never done training, even pro athletes are never done training or pro sport players, and he also teaches classes at community college and at the art institute here.

I decided to try student film so I applied to be a background actor for some short film that is only 16 minutes and I can’t really say what it is because I think that would be against the movie industry rules. But they were looking for real families with kids, real moms and dads and their kids and I got a quick response and tomorrow we all have to get up early to leave to go there. My mom helped me out with the wardrobe and good thing she read the email I showed her because I had misunderstood what they wanted for wardrobes. i thought they were saying they wanted minimum pastel accents and my mom told me no they mean they don’t want lot of it, keep it low. I even googled “minimum pastel accents” and it showed me the results so I thought those were the type of dressy clothes they wanted but black and white is fine too and khakis and slacks and they wanted costumes fr children and medieval stuff. So my son gathered up his medieval stuff and I got my husband’s shield and I found him a ninja costume at the Goodwill outlet and my mom helped me pick out some tops and I paid for them and she helped me find my son some dress pants. I am so excited I am looking forward to tomorrow.

I also want to continue taking acting classes but I would have to wait until next month or after that when he opens the registration again for April and May classes and I should have my tax money by then. His February and March classes are full. he also does private coaching and he gave me referrals to photographers who do inexpensive head shots.

On Thursday I actually went to a place that said they do acting classes and they pay you but it sounded good to be true but I decided to respond to that ad and check it out. Sure enough it was scam and I walked out of there without paying the guy anything. There were so many redflags and the man sounded convincing and was a very good liar but I knew it ws all bullshit because I had done my homework. there are lot of talent agencies that are not ledigiate and they like to pray on people who want to be models or actors so they make you pay up front because that covers their website fees and for your online portfolio they say and then they charge you for head shots and make you take their classes and they charge you for their classes too. This man here had his membership fee very cheap, only a dollar a day, and head shots being $45 and his acting classes being $190 a month and doing the math that is more expensive than my acting classes I take for 8 weeks. he also said after a year you get a $6,000 scholarship and I was skeptical. This was a man and he was alone in the business and had no one else, he had this tiny office in a big building and it was a tight space and he had no photos of any talents. His excuse was he just moved in there because the other place was charging him $800 for rent.

I went home and did my homework again by looking the agency up and looked the man up too and saw rip off reports about him saying what a predator he is because of how he talks to young girls and someone who was a experienced model wrote how crappy the photos were and the make up artists and this man didn’t even use professionals so that makes me wonder about the acting coaches. I sure dodged a bullet there. Also none of his talents on his website had a resume or even their last name. he also refers himself as “we” on his website. And the sad thing is doing this is not illegal. If you use these scam places to try and gain acting experience and do training with them you won’t be taken seriously by casting directors when they see that on your resume, you will just be a subpar to them and a sucker. No one wants a sucker and a subpar. I asked the other actors online about this place and they confirmed it was indeed a scam and the fact i am questioning if it is one or not tells me it is a scam. Even someone online told me they knew actors in my area and they have confirmed that agency is not legitimate. And with all these websites telling you what the red flags are for acting and modeling scams, all these scammers are just going to find other ways to sound legitimate and not show those red flags. But I will tell you, no real agency will charge you up front for being with them. You work for them, they do not work for you. They get 20% you make so they only make money when you do and they would not take in any inexperienced actors and they would want a head shot and a portfolio if you wanted to submit yourself to them for modeling. They also don’t charge you for classes or photo shots.

But I have no idea if I am going to make it in the industry but it would be worth a try. Movies always being filmed here now and several TV series and having several real agencies here and acting classes, I am in the right spot. No this is not LA or Atlanta or New York. I just live where Hollywood wants to make movies now and it wouldn’t surprise me if they build a movie studio here. But we have a bunch if warehouses so maybe not but my city has torn lot of them down and put in condos and nice parks and stores and lofts above them. I have heard about my area becoming LA but you still can’t get major roles in movies here, you need LA for that or Atlanta my teacher says. Even some people from LA in the movie industry have moved here including my teacher. He said he didn’t like it down there so he moved here. Even my cousin moved here but I thought it was because her parents live here so she moved back with them after leaving LA when the business went out she worked for. She is a film maker and does film and also has her own IMDB page. She is also a photographer. I don’t know if she makes money off of it but she is always posting them on Instagram.

The times I have applied to be an extra in the past, I never heard a call back but I did this time but this is just a very small company and they make short films and they are using a Grimm actor in their film. My teacher has also been in that show too and he just auditioned for some other film but he won’t tell us because it’s supposed to be a secret so that is why I am not saying much about this film either I am going to be a background actor in. He knows how to give out criticism without making you feel you suck and he gives you advice. half of the things he says i already know because I read it online when I was doing research. But I don’t think it would look good to put on a acting resume you got your training from watching youtube videos on acting and stuff and reading stuff on the internet about it and practicing it all at home. They won’t take you seriously unless you actually were enrolled at a theater or did any acting classes with an actor or studied at the art institute or studied it at community art center college or at a state university. I wonder if you can put workshops on your resume but that would be another question to ask on r/acting.

The only thing I regret is not doing this sooner but I didn’t know about any of this stuff and thought you had to go to LA for that and I didn’t know you couldn’t just sign up to audition and go in, it doesn’t work like that. Only way you can go on film without any acting experience is if you get discovered or if you are my daughter’s age or younger and are cute and have the right personality and follow directions well. But when you are older it’s another story. But it’s rare to get discovered and just be invited to audition and get the part because they felt you were right for it. Kids who act on film started out in theatre school and were in plays and then they went to an audition for film because they had experience and had that on their resume. But I read online to get started out with no experience is to take classes, do community theater or student film to get experience and to build up your resume. I asked my teacher where I can find student films and he said craigslist or Facebook. That is where I found the film I am going to be in as an extra. Craigslist and they responded quickly. Some websites will say to volunteer at theaters and son you will be invited to an audition. I doubt that would work on me because I am pretty much ignored. The advice also said to talk to other actors for advice and become friends with them. yeah how do I make friends? Well I talked to my teacher and he is an actor so there I go, I talked to an actor and got advice and got referrals from him. Noe I should ask him about video auditions and reels. he told me i didn’t need to do a reel but I told him some casting directors want one and agencies too and he told me I didn’t need to worry about that now. He is probably right because I want to take it slowly. I told my mom what I was doing and she sounded happy for me and was supportive about me being an extra and involving my kids in it. They were looking for real families. I didn’t involve my husband because I know he wouldn’t want to go and I was right. I was given the call sheet so I am very excited for tonight.

I am still having troubles with monologues but I am still working on it and trying to not slur my words in it and to slow down and to not have words leave my brain when I rehearse it.

Still best to start now than being 40 years old and starting out with my dream. I wasted ten years.

Thank you everyone

I want to thank everyone for the emails they have sent me, I have appreciated it. Though I don’t check my inbox often because I don’t get very many of them so I don’t check this email account daily or weekly. But I still read them when I see them. I am glad there are people out there that like this blog. I once thought about shutting it down but decided I wasn’t going to let some troll get to me and bring me down and apparently that is a normal feeling there. Yeah if you run a blog, you are going to get trolls and hate comments and get called a liar, that is part of blogging, that is going to happen.

I don’t respond often because I often don’t know what to say and because I feel burned out so I don’t say anything.

I also keep getting this spam email sometimes from different email addresses saying they have found serious coding issues or broken links or bad ones, etc. in my blog or about promoting my blog. I just ignore.

I did once shut down my contact me page because someone who I was talking to freaked me out so I stopped responding and opening their emails and didn’t go back to my email for awhile and I made my contact me page password protected.

But keep the emails coming. ūüôā

My son knows

My son is at an age now where I can actually talk to him and reason. He asks questions and also silly ones that make no sense because he asks about things that are not possible. But sometimes he asks good ones that are reality and possible. What if someone asked you what if unicorns existed? How would you answer? There are no unicorns so this question is impossible to answer. I just say there would be unicorns then.

But yesterday I was bringing him home from school and we were just talking and it leads onto other topics. He asked me what if I had twins and I told him it would be very stressful and I wouldn’t want two babies and that means more diapers to change, more of my time to feed them and more clothes and more laundry and I wouldn’t want any twins. Then I told him how some people have five babies at once or six or eight and that usually happens when the mom does fertility treatments to get pregnant and do egg implants and they tend to split into different eggs and bam they have so many babies and they get help from the state for it to provide for them. I cannot imagine all that stress of caring for all babies at once. Then my son asked me about eggs and I told him it gets fertilized and it plants in the uterus for it to grow and he asked what would happen if there was no fertilize for the egg so I told him the body gets rid of the egg and the blood with it and that is why they have their period. My son asked me what a period is and I said it’s where the woman bleeds out of her vagina and he asked me what a vagina was so I told him it’s where the baby comes out through when it’s born. Then I told him when his grandma got her periods when I was little, I would see her change her pads and she always called them diapees or her diaper. He asked me if women wear diapers and I said “they do for their periods so they won’t get blood all over so they either wear a pad in their panties or some protective underwear and then he asked me why I wore them. I just acted confused and he said he saw them on me in my room one time. Then he seemed to have forgotten about the question when I didn’t answer.

I should also tell him next time on this topic some women use tampons or moon cups or soft cups for their periods but you still get blood on your panties when you use a tampon because the string gets all bloody so I still wore a pad with it. Then I tried moon cups and liked it. But then they stop working after using them because they leak. I also remember yesterday we were on the topic about not everyone wearing underwear, daddy doesn’t wear underwear, my ex boyfriends didn’t wear them because it pushes their balls against their skin and they didn’t like it and even some women don’t wear underwear and grandma doesn’t wear them to bed. My son asked me if some people didn’t wear underwear. He will ask random questions, some are goofy and some are good ones.