I am so happy to wake up to an empty bed this morning. I have been getting my son to sleep in his own bed only to wake up with him in my bed. But today the bed was empty so I was glad he never came in my room. Instead he came in just to sit on the couch to watch youtube on my Nintendo Switch.
I still had my adult pacifier clipped to my shirt so I took it off and hid it under the pillow. My diaper was also soaking wet and uncomfortable and I knew I would probably leak if I wet it again. I felt the urge to go again but I hold it and am too lazy to bother changing or even going again. I would just have to lay flat on my back and relax and pee. Then when my son left the room for something, I got out of bed and took one last piss in it and changed. It felt so good to be in a fresh diaper than feeling that clammy feeling stuck to my skin.
Then I climbed back into bed and my son came back in a few minutes later. He gave me his stuffed llama, he won it yesterday at the fair, to hold and told me I could use him any time. He felt softer than Oddball. He also crawled into bed with me just to give me a hug and a back rub and he had his body up against my butt and he didn’t even notice my diaper. He never says anything about it anymore. Either he has stopped noticing or he has picked up it’s something to not be discussed. I am not going to talk about my lifestyle with him. Some think I should be open about it but I don’t feel comfortable about it. Like shall I tell him “Yeah that is my diaper” “Because I like wearing them” “I like how they feel” “I don’t like getting up to use the bathroom, remember when I told you how people either hold it or they pee in a bottle and some even go outside and I used to just pee in the forest whenever I was walking in it”? I think if I were incontinent, it would be easier for me to talk about but since I choose to wear them, I don’t want to talk about it and I don’t want to lie to him either. The truth could come out so lying is always a bad idea. One of my online friends thinks he could put two and two together when he is older and laugh about it with his friends. But I think he will also see I am not extreme with it where I go AB in public and make it real obvious I am padded and I keep it at a low level. You can find characters on adult clothes in stores, toys are collectibles, Legos are art, lot of adults watch kid shows, lot of adults play video games. I think you can still be yourself just as long as you keep it at an appropriate level. I have no idea where other ABs are getting they can’t be themselves.
I will never understand the mentality some have where they feel the need to flaunt it and be a AB in public or why they feel the need everyone must know they have on a diaper. I even read a story on Dailydiapers by someone about how they knew someone who was an AB and he couldn’t even keep it in his bedroom or do it when his kids were not around. But anyway he would be a AB in his home in front of his kids and his kids were so embarrassed they never had anyone come over because they didn’t want them to see how their dad is. What I got out of it was, “oh your kids won’t be confused if you are openly wearing diapers and dressed as a baby and going goo goo gah gah but they sure as well won’t invite any of their friends over and will make excuses why they can never come over.” Only time I have ever openly dressed as a baby but I didn’t show off my diaper, was when it was Halloween. My son just thought I looked silly and my husband told him it was Halloween so you are supposed to be silly. One year I even had my then infant daughter in a teddy bear costume and I pretended she was my stuffed bear and the stroller was my doll stroller and I was pushing my bear in it. We all went to The Children’s Museum and it was on Halloween so everyone was dressed up. My son was too young to even have an opinion about my costume.
I was more open about it when my son was real little because he was a toddler so he wouldn’t even know what was going on and then he would forget about it when he is older once I started doing it more privately. I used to write about it all the time here so it goes all the way back to 2012 and 2013. I know some ABDLs are against that but I say “what is the big deal? They won’t remember.” Parents even have sex in front of their little ones. But I have even seen other parents say how wrong that is. I don’t see that as involvement. As kids get older, you just adjust. I have gotten hate comments about my lifestyle years ago and claimed I was affecting my kids and how they will need therapy and what a horrible mother and daughter I am and how I need therapy. People are just ignorant and maybe they were just trolls. I know one of them obviously was. I have also gotten positive comments about it like they all seemed to be surprised how I can wear diapers 24/7 and still be a parent like that is some sort of accomplishment and a miracle. Uh diapers are just underwear, they don’t affect your mentality and how you function and live. I also think people underestimate kids and kids don’t really care what their parents wear, what types of bras they wear or underwear or what clothes they have on and that includes diapers and pads or tampons women use for their periods. They will be curious at first about anything. I also think people think going 24/7 is extreme so they question your sanity and how stable you are but when you are living an adjusted life and still work and still raise happy kids, wow, what a miracle. ABDLs judge other ABDLs for how they live their lives like when they go 24/7. They see it as extreme and taking over your life. They are also against other ABDLs wearing diapers for depression and anxiety or for happiness and say go to therapy instead than using diapers. To me this is all ironic because they are ABDLs themselves but are acting so diaperphobic about it so it makes me think they don’t fully accept it in themselves.
Okay, I don’t need a cookie or a medal for living a normal life and having happy kids just because I wear diapers 24/7. Do incontinent people get these things too? I wouldn’t think so. I think wearing 24/7 without a medical problem is no different than having bladder or bowel problems.
Rather people are negative or positive about my lifestyle still shows their ignorance. I think I will take the positive over the negative only because I like proving people wrong. Negative people will never admit to being wrong, once they have formed their own opinion, they have made up their mind and won’t change it. At least with positive people, they are admitting to being wrong when they show their amazement and then are congratulating you for doing something normal that is expected of everyone. But these things always happen with the minority. I am sure a drug user would get congratulated for living a stable life and having happy kids despite being a drug addict. I even wonder if that is even possible because every drug addict story I hear, they are all stealing from people and lying to get drugs and will go into ER just for drugs and they are all unstable and the kids are unhappy because all their money goes to drugs so that is why I don’t like drug addicts and have a hard time feeling sympathy for them. I can understand if they got addicted to their prescription and then it’s up to them to seek treatment for it and by then I will be supportive about it but if they just chose street drugs and decided to just start doing them and also choose to not seek help, I have no sympathy and don’t want them near me.