I hate Malware

Every time I use google images, I am more likely to get Malware when I look up any celebrity or adult diapers. But I have Malware Bytes on my system and I run it every time my computer runs slow and acts up. Tonight I had to reset my computer because my mouse quite working and the headphones and I had to close out of everything and I accidentally did shut down instead of restart so it froze as it was shutting down so I had to force it to shut off. Then I turned it back on and it started as new and I ran the program and it found the Malware and put them in quarantine and it was all from today. It must have happened when I was looking up Abena M4 diapers to see if there was a difference between M4 and x plus. My diapers don’t say xplus like some others did I saw in the photos. I sometimes miss the year 2000 when you didn’t get viruses or Malware and you could go on websites and not get viruses. That started when I was about 16. but I do remember the days of pop ups and those were always annoying. But now these days we have ad blockers and browsers have them and now we do ads now than pop ups. Ads are annoying because of viruses and you could accidentally click it.

I sometimes hate computers too because they wear out so fast and you need a new one every three or four years. I have had this one for four and it was a Christmas present and I got it around the time I had my son. One of the buttons doesn’t work for my touch mouse pad so I use the mouse I plug into my computer and speakers no longer work so I have to use headphones and we could never get it fixed or the mouse button. But sometimes it works and then it doesn’t and I have to really slam on the button to get it to click and that is annoying which is why I use the mouse. The portable CD rom doesn’t work either and either the thing is busted or the computer no longer recognizes it. I don’t play computer games anyway or listen to my CDs on here but that means I can’t download any programs on here that require you to insert a disc. But I never have had to do that either. Also Malware and viruses are also reasons why I hate computers.

I hurt my mother

Yes you read that right, I hurt my mother but it was an accident. I was in y son’s bed laying down with my daughter when I heard pounding. I ignored it and then I was wondering who is pounding on the door, no one had locked it. Was it my brother? Then I heard my mother shouting in the garage and Dad and I left the bedrooms we were in and she kept on pounding and I opened the door and there was my mother on the ground and she was crying. She said she fell and I didn’t know what to do. Do we call 911? Do we call for help? But my dad came and took over and she said she hurt her back and she slipped because shoes were left in front of the door. dad helped her up and I want back upstairs feeling guilty. I had taken my shoes off last night and left them in front of the door. Mom had always told us to not leave them in front of the door or someone could trip over them. I just thought “look where you are stepping when you go out.” My mom had to call in sick and her back is bruising badly and she also cut her elbow and it was so swollen she couldn’t see her bone and a bruise eventually showed up above her butt and she won;t be able to work tomorrow either. It wasn’t just me who hurt her, my dad hurt her too because his shoes were also left in front of the door. My husband knew what to do about it so when we went out to eat, we stopped at the store and my husband got a heating and cold pad for her and some pain medicine. He had me bring it up to her when we got home and tell her my sorry. Mom says it wasn’t my fault or my dad’s but I still feel it was because I left the shoes in front of the door. Mom told me now I know why it’s dangerous to leave shoes in front of the door.

Abena M4

I have been wearing Abena M4 since yesterday and they are thinner than I realized. They must have changed it. They don’t seem like thick diapers at all but they still hold well. They have not leaked on me yet but they do sag terribly and they got bunched up badly in the middle I had to change at the bookstore because it was so uncomfortable. Then I wore a generic brand diaper and then I wore it home and changed into another Abena and so far this had held out good, no bunching up and I have been peeing a lot. I have been drinking water because I am thirsty. Then I pooped in it and then peed a little. I would have to change before work and change into another Abena.

My husband decided to take us out to lunch because we got paid so I had to get dressed. While my husband got our son ready, I got changed and I did leak when I peed again because I peed again. Then I wrapped the diaper up and got a clean diaper on and got dressed.

How I feel about transabled


This is a controversial topic and I can see both sides to it. I wouldn’t want someone faking a disability to get services or handouts or have someone purposely do it to themselves to get it. But on the other hand there are people out there who do feel they are born with the wrong body so they feel incomplete with a complete working body. Just like how some people feel they are born with the wrong gender so they feel uncomfortable with their own bodies like how people do who have body identity disorder. I feel this is a real thing and it’s no different than being transgender. But it’s easier to accept transgender because they don’t need any hand outs or services. Men and women are both equal and get the same rights, rights to vote, rights to work, rights to own a house and drive, rights to sick leave and family leave act. But being disabled, you have limitations and no one wants to pay for someone to sit at home and do nothing or not work. Even people with disabilities get disgusted that someone would want to make themselves blind or deaf or have a missing leg or arm or hand or even want a mental condition or a mental illness. But if someone wants incontinence, I think that is easier to accept because it’s not really a disability since there are no services for them and they don’t need hand outs so it won’t really affect anyone but if our country decided to just easily cover diapers for people who are incontinent and give them good brands to wear so they can live comfortably with their condition and not be stuck with crappy diapers because they can’t afford premium brand, then people will start taking issues with people who want to be incontinent because no one would want to pay for their diapers for something they chose to have.

But I do say if someone wants to be disabled so they live like they are, I say to each their own just as long as they are not effecting anyone such as taking hand outs, and using the handicap parking spot. If they are still employed because their “disability” doesn’t stop them from working that job, then no harm done. So if they want their leg cut off or their arm and they can still do their job, to each their own, they are not hurting anyone. If someone wants to be deaf but can pay for their own hearing aides, to each their own.

I remember when I was a kid, I thought hearing aides, wheelchairs, crutches, and other things certain kids used were cool so I thought they were lucky to have those devices. I used to play with Amanda’s crutches when I was six and seven and I could do things with them she couldn’t even do and I thought her desk was cool and wished I could use it the following year but at age eight she was no longer in my class so when she was next door, her desk went with her. I also thought powered wheelchairs were cool and I used to see a girl ride around in it when I was five but back then I didn’t know any better because I didn’t know these kids couldn’t walk and I didn’t understand their legs did not work. I just thought they had them because they could and it was a special rule they were given and I was a boring dull person so I had nothing special I could have other kids didn’t had. But then I grew out of this when I realized. When I was in 5th grade I understood why this boy named Chris could use a laptop all the time and he did all his work on it. He could not write due to his disability but he could read and spell so he could push buttons to type and he had an aide with him. I did not see it as a privilege. I saw it as something that allowed him to do his school work.
The difference is I grew out of it and people with body identity disorder do not and I never ever wanted a disability or have a body part that didn’t work while those people did when they were children and it never went away. It’s not like they also want to have one, they do not choose to feel this way either and I am sure if they could just stop, they would. I doubt they decided one day “Oh cool a wheelchair, I want one of those, I think I will pick a missing leg.”