I do not like bullies, I hate them. There was a 13 year old aspie boy who is being bullied at his school and lot of people are saying he brought it upon himself. Whenever we hear about a person with a disability getting picked on, we always assume they are the victim and being picked on because they are different. The truth is, I was reading two articles about it:
and I found out just from reading the comments that the kid was the bully. He has chased a six year old girl down the street with a bat and she didn’t even do anything to him to provoke it. He has brought pellets to school and has threatened to kill his school mates and also would tell them to go kill themselves and even one of his victims left comment about how he was bullied by him. This isn’t about autistic behavior he was doing, it was bullying. He called a kid a nasty name so he got socked for it. Yes I understand how we tend to lack a social filter and may say the wrong things but if we say something and get socked for it, my mom would have told me lesson learned if I did that as a kid. Okay if I called someone the n word, I cannot blame it on autism. I know it’s offensive. I don’t know what nasty word he called someone’s nephew so I can’t really comment on it and who knows what the parent meant by nasty word. How hard is it to not call someone a nasty word? How hard would it be to not call someone the n word? C’mon on people. Are they really saying in the comments who are defending the boy ASD kids are not able to not call someone a nasty word? Even members get banned from Wrongplanet if they sprout any racism or homophobia or call someone a nasty name since it’s a personal attack. We sure don’t have excuses on that forum for our autism for such behavior.
But reading the comments really lost my sympathy for the poor child. I just have no respect for bullies and I used to bully my own bullies because they were not nice to me. I still bullied them even if they were not even bothering me. It never made sense why I shouldn’t bug them, they were bullies. Then in 5th grade my mom told me to say to this kid who lived on our block, next time the kid calls me stupid, tell him to look it up in the dictionary it has a picture of him and every name he calls me, tell him to lo look that word up and it has a picture of him. So I tried it and it worked and he never bothered me again. My mom didn’t care what I did, she just told the mother her kid needed to toughen up (giving her a taste of her own medicine since she thought other kids needed to toughen up whenever her son picked on them). I also remember kids would do the “Beth germ” crap and say “blackout” as a way to protect themselves from my germs. After a while I started to just touch them to give them my germs and they would get mad at me about it and call me stupid. I never understood why it would piss them off but my school counselor told me when I was in junior high it was because I was taking away their power. But by fifth or sixth grade, the Beth germ thing stopped. They had moved on.
I have noticed that when you have autism, it seems like it’s okay to bully other kids and blame the victim (the victims the autistic kid is bullying) and if they defend themselves, they are the bullies. It infuriates me. I never got any special privileges as a kid. I was given the same rules as everyone else and expected to follow them. I had no excuses and I would also get in trouble if I did anything to my bullies. I was never treated like a label nor treated like a disability and even the school didn’t excuse me. It’s so easy to paint someone as a victim when they have a disability. I mean what happens if some autistic person tries to rape me so I fight him off me and defend myself and flee, I would get blamed for it for kicking and hurting him? Or what if he did rape me and some angry mob went after him, would people paint him as a victim? This makes me sick and that is how I view this incident. Reading the comments, I see the kid has gotten suspended before and kicked off the bus for his bullying and he is still at it. I will agree with some comments that more needs to be done since suspension has not worked and perhaps the kid should be in some behavior program. I think all bullies should be in one if they are not able to quit. Also the mother of the child posted and he does get punished at home for his behavior but the other kids on the bus didn’t get punished for theirs like touching his bag or hitting him. Good for her then for not giving him special treatment and no one ever told her about the bat incident. A parent can’t do their job if no one tells them what their kid did wrong. If my parents never told Frankie’s parents their kid threw an ax at my brothers and their friends, they wouldn’t have shipped him off to Seattle because they would not have known about it.
Also to the person in the comments who thinks it’s ignorant to think a special needs child should be removed from the room when they are acting up or having an outburst or disrupting other students or being violent just like any other child, I was always taken back to the resource room whenever I would have an episode in class or start getting disruptive with my constant questioning or my anxiety. No way was my aid going to have me disrupt the other students and the teacher so yes I agree with the mother who thinks special needs kids should be removed from their classroom if they get disruptive. No free pass. I was also given ISS for throwing a book at a girl’s face because she was insulting me about my problem. But yet she didn’t get in trouble for trying to attack me and my mom called it self defense, well I got fed up with kids being ignorant about my disability I snapped and threw a book at the girl and she happened to be the culprit. Why does this have to be backwards but not for other kids on the specturm if this were to happen to them? Mom said I wanted to be treated like a normal person, they treated me like a normal person and other parents out there want their disabled kids to be treated normal and so do they with disabilities but yet they don’t like if this happens to them or their child what happened to me? How fair is that? That’s why it all infuriates me ASD kids get a free pass to bad behavior and their victims are the “bullies.”
I have also been suspended from softball once for a day for flipping out on my teacher because I thought she was screaming at me when really she was just scared because she thought I was going to run in the street because the drivers were not watching the road (they were all distracted by the old school building being torn down) and I would get really impulsive sometimes when I would get very upset or very excited but I was no idiot to run in the street (running in the street with lot of traffic means getting hit by a car so why would an impulsive person do it if they know the consequence?)and why would I want to run in the street just to look at the building being torn down? I was seen as the one being disrespectful and got suspended from my team for one day.
Now you can understand my politically incorrect “ignorant” thought about disabilities and ASDs because of how I was raised and treated. Even Temple Grandin was raised the same way and I will quote my favorite line from her “autism is no excuse for poor table manners.” Yeah that pisses off some people on the spectrum and see her as arrogant and some blame it on her own autism for how she talks about the whole spectrum thing.