Showing signs of autism

Looks like our son will be having autistic parents. Just kidding, I wanted to say that. She only said he was showing signs of autism. My husband went to his appointment to see a psychiatrist for SSDI. She did a bunch of tests with him like blocks and puzzles and all that, things he did when he was a kid. She also asked him a bunch of questions about his past and it was very hard for him to talk about it. Even I don’t know much about his life because he does not like to talk about it so I don’t ask him about it. he even told her about his birth trauma his mom had with him and his lack of friends. Based on things he said, she told him he shows signs of autism and she got a book out on it and looked at the symptoms of it he had. But she didn’t say he had it of course because it would take a lot more sessions for her to know if he does or not and she was only there to get information, not to diagnose or counsel him.

My husband told her his wife (me) had autism and she said it would bring us closer together.

So my husband came home and told me this and I was surprised and wasn’t surprised. I wasn’t surprised because I knew from the start he had similarities with it but I figured it was from his environment due to his other disabilities he had like brain damage and symptoms overlap. I was surprised because I don’t see any symptoms ever from him. He isn’t like those aspie men I read online by their wives who are self righteous, jerks, cold, uncaring. My husband is none of that. Plus he is not rigid, he does not stim, his social skills are fine because he can read social cues and other things and he helps me in social situations, he is very sensitive and cares a lot about me, he does not get angry nor does he have any anger issues, I don’t have to walk on any eggshells and he does not get upset with change or and he doesn’t have any restricted routines. So I am surprised at what she said. My husband told me everyone is different with it and he just holds it all in and he is inward, I am outward. So how could he have signs? Is it possible to have it and not show symptoms? This is daily I am talking about and all the time. I don’t mean them coming and go. My husband also told me he used to be a lot like me and he overcame lot of it.

I have given up reading about aspies and relationships because it was so depressing. It was never anything good and I always found it offensive we were being painted that way and it was being blamed on it.

But at least she didn’t hand it out like candy like some people online have claimed doctors do. She told him he only showed signs, didn’t say he had it because it would take a lot more sessions for her to know.

Him sharing this with me didn’t make a difference or change anything. I also felt the urge to post it on Facebook but because I treat it like real life, anything I am not willing to share with everyone in real life, I don’t put on Facebook. Plus I wouldn’t want him posting about my autism on his so why would I post about a doctor saying he shows signs of it? It would only be up to him to tell people. It’s nothing important for everyone to know. It wasn’t important for me to know either.

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3 thoughts on “Showing signs of autism

  1. Hey Beth. I think that at this point the psychologist/psychiatrist would say he has Autistic Type Symptoms, which means he has, according to certain standards, signs that would point toward being Autistic. Remember though that he very well could be more Ausperbergers than anything. Personally you ought to have him further tested just to be in the know than anything.

    Also, you may wonder about your son, just from being in the environment he is in. Have you had him evaluated in preparation for qualifying your son for early childhood education? I would suggest you pursue it for him.

    In addition for yourself are you aware of Autistic Self Advocacy Network – PDX It’s a group that is ONLY for persons on the autistic spectrum who are 18+ and are either medically or self-diagnosed. http://www.meetup.com/ASAN-PDX/ It might be a good support group for yourself.

    I’ve been missing you at our munches we’ve been holding, and basically not staying in touch like we use to. From your blog it seems as though you are getting a good bit of support from your parents, which I’m glad to hear about.

    • I was going to the last munch but got lost on the way. I couldn’t find the one street to turn on so I never found the place so I turned around and went home. I spent an hour looking for it.

      They have gotten rid of Asperger’s in the DSM so it’s autism now. They call it autism spectrum disorder. My husband doesn’t want to be tested for it. To him it’s just a label and won’t change anything. He finds it a waste of money. He is doing fine.

      I have been to that group you posted and there is someone there I don’t get along with (I don’t talk to her and I just ignore her and we are fine) and my work schedule keeps me from going there and I was booted from the group. I go to other autism groups.

      • I would suggest you google the address and find the address that way. It’s off hwy 217 then East, like you are going back toward Portland on Hillsdale-Beaverton Road.

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