Today was my first day of work. It felt like I was starting school again and my summer vacation had ended. But too bad I don’t get this every year. I would have to be a teacher or have a baby every year lol. Now we can start saving again and I need to take my computer in to get it fixed because my CD portable drive isn’t working so we can’t reinstall windows and I am not renewing my virus protection plan if I am going to get it reinstalled anyway so I need to take it in this week. I have all my files on the external hard drive.
My daughter took the bottle this time while I was at work so she didn’t starve herself like last time when my husband and I were at the park.
My parents made u for my birthday they forgot about. I decided on the park and we all went together in two different cars. I took the freeway and my parents went another way. They did not want to get stuck in traffic and we did. Even though it was Saturday, everyone must have been going somewhere because the freeway was slow until we got to I-5 and went on it and I went the same route my we used to go to my psychologist or group therapy because it was on the way and I remembered the route. We drove by the two former radio stations, one of them used to be my favorite, were now vacant. The stations still exist but they are in a different location. We drove to the bridge and crossed it and went to the park that is right by it. We met up with my parents after we got out of the car and we were just getting our kids out when my dad called and waved to us. They had gotten there at the same time as us.
We all headed to the park and the entry fee is free. My mom had to stop by the restrooms and asked if I needed to go and I said no. I wonder if she forgets I wear diapers or is that her way of asking if I need to change? Perhaps it’s asked out of habit. But she was the only one that went and then we all headed to the ticket booth. Mom bought my husband and I bracelets and our son too but he got the limited one while my husband and I got the deluxe one.
The whole place was packed and there were lot of work companies there having parties and there were private parties going on by families. We did go on the rides and my son did good but it got very hot out so he started to act up and get impatient waiting in line. I had to hold him and he was crying. I was getting overwhelmed. So my parents decided to let us two be alone and they will take our kids home and have our son go on more of the rides first. My dad and I swapped bags because I needed to get some stuff out of the diaper bag, my wallet and Nintendo 3DS and games. Our daughter was naked because she got hot too and she was also fussing. Lot of people had water and there was even a spot with water spraying for people to go in and cool off and my husband and I went there about three times. I wasn’t feeling well myself, I felt tired and I felt nauseated but we still went on the bumper cars and a teenager in front of us who looked to be 15 or 16 passed out and lied on the ground. I thought she had a seizure but no it was a heat stroke and staff had to help her and she was given some water. That made me worried because I didn’t want to pass out too. Then after the bumper cars, we got on the train and then we got some water and my husband got food but when I washed my hands, a girl had thrown up in the sink and the mother had to clean it out. Then I left the restroom and I saw a park employee have a bucket with water with vomit in it and he poured it down the sewer. I did go on another ride when I no longer felt sick to my stomach. That was because I rested and had some water. I didn’t want to go on any of the spinning rides and then throw up. Then it was finally starting to cool down and more people were arriving. My husband and I were going to go on the last ride when my dad called because our daughter wouldn’t take the bottle and she was very hungry. My husband and I just left the line and headed home despite being told to take our time. I was just worried so I had to leave. I drove home like normal and we got home and our baby was sleeping but Mom told me the story about how mad she was and her whole body was red and she would suck on her boob and then get mad because nothing was coming out but she wouldn’t take the bottle. I took her from her and brought her to my room and she woke up a little and ate from me for a very long time.
So crazy day today, two people throwing up, one heat stroke, very packed and long lines, my husband and I only went on three rides after my parents left, daughter not taking the bottle so we couldn’t go on our last ride, so hot and I felt sick to my stomach. And I told my son he could go back on the same rides again after he goes on the others but he ended up not doing it because he got too hot and too tired. Last I heard, he was going back on the frog ride again when we separated to do our own thing.
Today is my birthday and my parents went to the coast. They forgot about my birthday but I wasn’t offended. I forgot my husband’s so they forgot mine so it’s even now.
We went to the mall and I went to build a bear workshop. Like in my story, I selected the white Hello Kitty but I had my own experience. I selected a sound to put in her and the heart for a heart beat and she stuffed it and she puts the price tags on the tag from the sound box and the heart for the cashier to ring up. I selected a different outfit and the same shoes and I did scrub her fur and got her a pair of underwear. I wanted to get more but I didn’t want to spend too much there and wipe out our bank account. My husband let our son pick his out too and he got Spiderbear and named him that and he got a Spiderman costume with it and that was it. He also got a heartbeat for it. Then we register our bear and kitty.
We also went to hot Topic and just looked around and we went to The Disney Store and got my son a Spiderman jacket and I went to Gamestop and got a game and I thought it would be five bucks rounding but the price had changed and it was $1.99. I used my Gamestop card and it knocked it down twenty cents.
Then on the way home we got a cake and my husband forgot to buy a wine cooler or Mike’s Hard Lemonade. I was at the mall and I walk by the Oregon store and I see these drinks and I ask if they are drinks and she says yes and asked if I would like to try some and I said sure. Then she said “What beer would you like to try?” and I said “no thanks” and walked away. I didn’t want to drink any beer. My husband caught up to me and asked me what did i say and I said I told her no thanks and he said she was laughing. I asked why and he said people wouldn’t normally say that and I said why and he said lot of people drink beer. I asked him what would a person say if they didn’t drink it and found out it was beer and he didn’t know the answer.
Then we came home and our son was sleeping and I brought everything inside including the diapers I left in my trunk of my car. I brought everything up and my husband told me to lie on my bed. I did and I made him close our door in case our son woke up. I didn’t want him to come to my room and see me getting my diaper changed or us having sex. My husband lifted my skirt up and took off my wet diaper and had sex with me. Then he put a cloth diaper on me and plastic pants and let me play with my toy (the computer). We were only gone for four hours.
I got to experience my first Build A Bear. It’s expensive but worth it for special occasions like birthdays. I plan on taking my daughter there when she turns two or three.
My work is so incompetent. I found out not only was she supposed to send me the paperwork about when I return to work, she was also supposed to send a form for my doctor to fill out to release me back to work. When I called them about when I return t work, I told her I never got the papers from her and she told me I return to work on the 21st. So this is my last week on maternity leave. She told me I am to call my supervisor and let him know I am returning and I told her I don’t know his name or how to reach him because my other supervisor quit right before I went on maternity leave and she gave me a number to call to contact and I called that person to reach him so I could get contact information to call my new supervisor. It was just a pager number she gave me so I called and put in my phone number and hung up. Then my mom came home and asked if I ever called and I said yes and he hadn’t returned my call yet. My mom decided to butt in and she called the main building and got more information from the receptionist and I found out the rest of what she was supposed to send me. My mom somehow got the extension number for me to call her and my mom found out when she leaves by and mom let me knew and she wrote down what to say to her so first thing tomorrow, I get up and call at eight in the morning. It was as if I had to write my blog for her to help me finally. Like the time I had a meltdown when my ex boyfriend wouldn’t give me this piece Dish network wanted or they would charge me big money. Then two days later he finally calls me and asks “Do you still want the thing?’ (I don’t remember what it was called so I am calling it a thing) and I said yes and he said he was coming right over so be in the front yard. I put my robe on and go outside and he arrives and hands me the thing. It was all so simple and it was as if he saw my drama online about it and realized it was all serious for me and it was giving me tremendous anxiety and their “threat” was giving me all that distress. But you know what, that is one of the reasons why I am not with him. I don’t need to be with a person who will wait until I have a meltdown before he does something that is important to me. Anxiety sucks and so do meltdowns. I envy anyone on the spectrum who can hold them all in until they let it out but me when I do that, it gives me chest pains. I wonder if it gives them pain and they never mentioned it.
Now my mom has decided she will help me with head start. God I feel so incompetent.
My son has his first appointment today since age two. I have to go get his insurance stuff from the kitchen before I leave. I have gotten my kids ready and myself. But when I took off my cloth diaper I had just put on an hour and a half before, it was damp. I knew I had peed it because it was too wet for it to just be moisture from the pants and the sweat. It also smelled like pee too. When did I pee it? I don’t remember doing it. This is what happens sometimes when I wear them 24/7. I pee and don’t realize it or I forget I had gone and I didn’t even think about it. I put it in the bucket anyway and it’s full again so I plan on taking them to the laundry room to wash. Time to do it now before I forget and before I leave.
Today I had an appointment and got the mirena put in. It wasn’t bad. The worst part was when the doctor had to stick this long thing up my vagina and into my uterus to measure so he would know how to insert it. I also sweat buckets. First they had to put the thing in me they use for papsmears. They they had to open my cervix more and I hardly felt anything. It just felt ticklish inside. Then they had to measure it to see how far they have to go and then the next step was the mirena. It was real tiny and then they had to cut the string and tuck it behind the cervix and then they removed the thing. Then I told them I would need a pad now because I was bleeding and they told me there will be spotting for 3 to 6 months. I didn’t feel crampy at all after it was all over and I was given a pad. I put it inside my swim bottoms and put my pants back on and my shoes.
I went without a diaper because I knew I would have to take off my pants and I didn’t want my pull up to be seen so I wore swim bottoms there. I also didn’t leak urine or feel the urge to go. But I did have to give a urine sample and I didn’t even feel I had to go but then felt it a little when I sat on the toilet and went. They had to be sure I wasn’t pregnant. I knew I wasn’t but it’s something they do to be sure. I didn’t change into a diaper until I was home and my pad got too bloody in the middle. I still have no cramping. This all took over an hour because they had to tell me the risks and what to expect and after and having to sign the paper. Then I was given two pills for cramping so it won’t be as bad during the procedure and then I had to wait before it kicked in before they moved me to another room. Then I have handed a blanket and told me to take off my bottoms and underwear. Then I had to wait for them to come back in the room again to start.